This Just In

Someone get me a copy of Twilight so I can take a picture of myself lighting it on fire. I'd buy a copy, except then I'd be giving Stephenie Meyer money. No thanks.

Dakota Culkin Killed By Car

http://defamer.com/5107549/dakota-culkin-killed-by-car

"Law enforcement sources tell us Dakota Culkin was walking on the west side of Los Angeles Tuesday when she stepped off a curb and was struck by a car," reports TMZ.

My condolences to Macaulay. This doesn't look like it's been a good month for celebrity siblings...

Britney Spears Interview video!

This video was a lot of fun too, except I wish I'd been wearing a different shirt when we filmed the Fluffy Light-Up Lamp commercial. But we found lots of funny pictures for the backgrounds and the music is awesome.

'Ruffalo Died in Russian Roulette Game'

http://www.imdb.com/news/ni0624726/

The prime suspect in the death of Mark Ruffalo's brother has told authorities the deceased shot himself in the head while playing a game of Russian Roulette.

People actually play that? Damn. People really should be smarter than this...

THE BEST ANTI-TWILIGHT VIDEO EVER (STARRING ME)

I had a lot of fun making this video, especially with the in-video text. I wish I'd had more time to work on it, but I think it turned out pretty well. I think the video illustrates my hatred of Twilight well. I would have talked about more ridiculous things from the books, but time was limited. Let's just say the half-vampire baby she gives birth to in the fourth book, like, kills her as it's born, by BREAKING HER BACK. Holy crap. Who gave Stephenie Meyer her book deal again? I would like to personally go slap that person, hard.

7/22/11 - I would like to amend this post by saying that I have now read all of the Twilight books. My opinions regarding them remain the same. FAIL.

Harrison Ford Joining J.J. Abrams' Produced Comedy?

http://www.firstshowing.net/2008/12/08/harrison-ford-joining-jj-abrams-produced-comedy/

Details are pretty sketchy on this, but according to MTV, Harrison Ford has joined a comedy called Morning Glory. The long-delayed project is being produced by J.J. Abrams and directed by Brit Roger Michell (according to EW in 2007) and supposedly stars Reese Witherspoon as a struggling female news producer in New York City who recruits an iconic, egotistical anchorman (presumably Ford) to revive a failing network's morning show.


Uh.

Harrison, I love you, I really do. But comedies don't really work out so well for you, do they? Let's take a look at Hollywood Homicide. Pretty much the only thing the movie had going for it was Josh Hartnett's Mustang Saleen. Beautiful car. Other than that...uh...it really wasn't that great. And I am your biggest fan. Really.

You know what? How about The Cisco Kid? I must be the only person on the planet who's heard of that movie. Why? Because it was a theatrical flop. People don't like you in comedy roles, Harrison. None of your movies are hits unless there's at least one shot of you sticking your index finger in someone's face while shouting angrily. Trust me on this.

Stephen Colbert Interviews Barbara Walters Using Soft-Focus Lens...On Himself

http://jezebel.com/5101917/stephen-colbert-interviews-barbara-walters-using-soft-focus-lens-on-himself

The above clip shows part of the interview. Stephen Colbert is awesome, I wish I watched his show more often. I definitely want to see A Colbert Christmas though.

Luxury cruise ship outruns pirates

http://www.cnn.com/2008/WORLD/africa/12/01/pirates.cruise.ship/index.html?eref=rss_topstories

Good for them. I bet those pirates were just drooling over all the stuff they could steal. Hahah!