Friday, November 23, 2012

Okami Chapter 5: Take Some Responsibility, You Dumb Kid

Hello, reader(s)! I hope everyone had a happy Thanksgiving! We did, and it was tasty to boot.

In today's post, the intrepid Amaterasu travels to a new area, Blooms a new Guardian Sapling and steals a key from a little kid. Fun stuff. Read on for more details!

So, after we learned how to do the Water Lily brush move (and practiced making some water lilies near Susano's house), Issun suggested we head to the nearby waterway where a ferry used to operate and head for Agata Forest to see what was up.

You call that a waterway? I really don't think a ferry would fit in there, Issun. Maybe a really tiny one. Like a gondola or something.

I'm not even going to ask why the wall is blocked off. Maybe some bad guys bricked it up or something. But how did people get on the ferry? Did they jump? I just don't see that going well, especially if the "ferry" was really a gondola. I think maybe I'm overthinking this.

So we bombed the wall and went through the find only devastation on the other side!

No, not more cursed zones!

...Well, I guess there wouldn't be any more game if there weren't more. Okay, carry on.

I know, right? But...yeah. No more game.

Yeah, I don't really understand that reasoning, but whatever. We already know Issun is a bit of an idiot.

That doesn't look fun at all, but we must persevere.

So we did some exploring, and found a cave...

That's a weird-looking building over there.

That's a house? Judging by the skull on top, I thought it was some kind of temple for demonic rituals.

Well, I don't see the cursed zone in the cave, so it can't be that bad, right?

And look, there's a lady in the house!

Wait. You were waiting for us?

I...see. Okay then.

Oh, that explains it. Well, I guess this is a sorta-fantasy game, after all. Carry on.

You could have shown that a little earlier, guys.

So then she said something about...something, but I didn't take photos of what she said and I can't remember what it was. Oh well. Something something, defeat evil, something something.

Oh, I see. Centennials being important and all.

No, I had my eyes closed the whole time and just wandered in here. Duh.

Somebody actually said his name! Holy crap!

Keep your shirt on, grandma.It can't be too strong, or it would have spread back over Shinshu Field and Kamiki Village.

If that's what you call idle talk, I'd hate to see what you call serious talk.

Okay, strange lady. I'll play your game.

MONEY? What do I look like, Richie Rich's pet pooch?

Uhhh...wait a second. Where do you get these bones from, exactly?

...Go on...

Ooh! Ooh! I bet that's a clue! What could it possibly mean?!

Hmm, interesting. Well, let's do some exploring, eh?

This looks like the only path I can take right now. Well, I guess I'll follow it...

Ooh! Is that a cave up there?

I think it is! Let's go inside!

Well, that looks like a bombable wall to me. Bombs away!

Yay, a Guardian Sapling! Let's Bloom it!

And...commence pictures of flowers spreading everywhere!



More water and flowers!

Yay, Agata Forest is back to normal!

After the cutscene was over, I inspected around the Guardian Sapling and found a new weapon made of beads or something, which prompted Issun to give me some instructions concerning the use of different weapons.


But before we could move on and do whatever it was we were going to do next, we were rudely interrupted.

It's...flute music? How strange...

More flute music...

A mystery flautist dressed in pink? How quaint.

This just keeps getting weirder...

Wait a second, are you calling me evil? Who are you?!

Waka? Hey, I've got a few questions I need to ask you! Wait, the gods' gift to women? Where did you ever get that idea?

Um...hello, I guess.

Seriously. He's like a more-flamboyant Liberace or something. You know, except not fat or gay (presumably).

So you jump straight to insulting me? Screw you, guy.

Yeah! Why don't you come down here and say that again, you chump?

Whoa! Just what is this guy's deal?

And then Waka whipped out a sword, but it happened too fast, so I didn't get a picture of it.

Ha. Ha. Ha. *slowclap*

...You abandoned your duties and fled back to the capital city? away screaming like a little girl? No, wait, that would be a clue.

Oh. So whoever did it is probably someone who lives in Kamiki Village? Well, that narrows it down to about six people. Wait a second. That rock couldn't have been light. So you just stood there and watched whoever it was heave the rock into place? You're a terrible investigator.

I agree. Wait a second. I just changed my primary weapon to those weird beads. Why am I suddenly wearing the shield again in the cutscene? Are you telling me they didn't make it so whatever I'm wearing automagically shows up in the cutscene? Come on, even Zelda games can do that.

No, I'm just getting ready to run away screaming like a little girl. Idiot.

Why do you keep using French words? Is that supposed to make you more attractive to women? Because that white wingy thing you're wearing on your head isn't doing you any favors.

I didn't know swords made noise...

Ohhhh. I get it! Wait, so the sword is going to babble at me about how it loves me and all that other junk? Great, next it's going to tell me it's hungry and then fall asleep!

So we fought, and I almost died, but I fought back and prevailed. I always hated fighting this guy.

Wait a minute. Is that Pillow Talk talking, or you? I'm confused. Giggity.

Wait a second. He called me by my real name! What's this guy's game, anyway?

Whatever. Are you going to start making sense any time soon?

Blah blah blah, cursed zone, consuming everything in its path, curse of Orochi, don't say his name, etc.

Congratulations. You're an idiot!

Well, I'm guessing it would have been a lot harder if the culprit hadn't waited for you to leave, huh?

Yeah. You know, actually doing things, instead of play-fighting with wolves.

Right, that's what Issun just said.

Oh? So because my playskills are so rusty, you're just going to stand there and insult me? I don't have to take that from you!

Oh, it's on now, jerk! You're going down!

Yeah, you tell him, Issun!

You know, on second thought, there's not really much you can do with that know, other than stabbing him in the toe and hoping it hurts...

Okay, that's just a stupid thing to say.

Right. You know, because he could squish you really easily.

Prophecy? But I already got one of those. Well, I guess I don't really know what I'm supposed to do next...

Okay, so start talking.

That...doesn't make any sense.

I...okay then.

So you're a prophet now? I thought you were the gods' gift to women. I don't think you can be both at once.

Get out of here, you freak.

So, since we had no idea what we were supposed to do next, we decided to explore the newly-Bloomed forest to see what we could see. And then we saw this guy!

No. Why?

So he told me about how the nearby river had been flooded during a rainstorm and washed out the bridge to Kusa Village. I'm guessing that's where I need to go next? Since I'm supposed to be finding Guardian Saplings and everything?

Okay, anyway. Karude up there asked his son to build a new bridge, but the kid is too busy playing with his dog to get any work done. Sigh. I guess we get to go find the kid and see what's up.

Ume? That's your dog's name? What does that even mean?

What's that stick you're holding?

Okay, are you going to tell me why you're fishing instead of building a new bridge?

...........So you're just swinging your stick back and forth pretending to fish. You're not even trying, are you?

So the kid told me his sob story about how he and his dog were exploring some nearby ruins. Suddenly they heard a loud roaring noise (the Plot Roar rearing its ugly head, perhaps?), and Kokari got scared and ran away, probably screaming like a little girl. When he got out of the ruins and locked the door, the dog was nowhere to be found! And then a giant fish somehow swallowed the key to the ruins. Basically, the kid abandoned his loyal doggie friend to die. That's companionship for you.

Don't tell me you're chicken.

So then the kid started crying about the missing key and Issun got annoyed.

Tell me about it.

That's right! And you've got to be able to fish to get the key back, clearly. Too bad you don't have any fishing line or a hook, huh?

I see. So when the fishing fails, are you going to just throw yourself in and hope you can find the key on the bottom you can't see?

Blah blah blah, something about a giant fish swallowing the moon reflected on the water (what?), kid still doesn't have a fishing line, I'm going to have to intervene, why can't people ever do things for themselves, etc.

Fine. But how am I supposed to help him with my brush? He still doesn't have any fishing line.


My suspension of disbelief is hanging by a thread here (heh). I mean, really?

Ugh, okay. I'll follow your weird instructions...

So, after drawing a line from the fishing pole to a fish, I had to use the nunchuk control stick to make the kid pull on the line without getting tired. Then, when the fish (or whatever was hooked) leaped out of the water, I had to do a Power Slash to actually catch the...thing. Well, this is what we caught first.

That's not even a fish! Let's try again.

That's not a fish either! Okay, one last try!

Now that's more like it. Yay!

You are terrible and I hate you.

I mean, good job!

And then the fish coughed up something that didn't look at all like a key!

Really? Looks like a shiny, transparent turnip to me. Are you sure it's not edible?

The fish did eat it, after all. Well, on second thought, fish aren't exactly known for knowing what's good and bad for them to eat. Just ask my grandparents' fish that ate the mercury from a broken thermometer. Oh wait. You can't, because he's dead. Okay, that was a depressing tangent, but whatever.

I think you've screwed things up enough for one day, junior.

No! Go catch some more fish with your nonexistent fishing line.

I hope he practices bridge-building while we're gone.

Right. Let's go see if this turnip thing actually is a key.

So we found the entrance to the ruins, and...

Well, look at that! It is a key. And I thought it would be so tasty...

It's kind of hard to tell, but that's a picture of the doors of the ruins opening. Not sure how the kid got the doors shut in the first place. Oh, right, I'm not supposed to question these things. Okay then.

Sounds like Issun's just as excited about a dungeon slog as I am. Well, I'll save that for my next post.

Until next time, heroes!