Russell Crowe Will Play Robin Hood AND The Sheriff in Ridley Scott's Nottingham (maybe)

http://moviesblog.mtv.com/2008/09/27/breaking-russell-crowe-will-play-robin-hood-and-the-sheriff-in-ridley-scotts-nottingham/

This should be interesting. I hope Crowe as Robin Hood is the clean-shaven one. However, this story might not be true:

mjkbk (09.29.08 10:38 PM)
Sure, Russell has the chops to do it. Only thing is, according to HIM, this story isn't true. He sent the following message to his longtime fansite, Murph's Place (http://www.murphsplace.com/crowe/news.html): "I won't be playing two roles in Nottingham.If I ever were to do that I'd pick roles that were more diverse, say Tuck and Marion. RC" I think maybe Ridley was pulling your journalistic leg.

The Great Salad Dressing Balloon Race Across the Boot of Italy

So as you all know (or should know) by now, Paul Newman passed away on Friday. I'm kind of ashamed to admit I've never seen any of his movies. Okay, I've seen most of Cars, but that doesn't count. Well, that will change. I'm planning an epic Paul Newman movie-fest, complete with many salads slathered with none other than Newman's Own Light Balsamic Vinaigrette salad dressing. If you've ever bought this stuff before (or looked at the bottles) you will notice there is usually a little story on the back of the bottle. I'm posting the most epic story of all, because it is either the best or the worst thing I've ever read.

The Great Salad Dressing Balloon Race Across the Boot of Italy

An armada of balloons loaded with Light Balsamic. The starter's gun- Bazoombah! They all rise majestically into the air. Newman's Own Balloon, with fewer calories, more taste, and secretly propelled by charity, flies faster than Kraft and farther than Wishbone. First across. First on the ground. El Piloto quaffs mucho quaffs of Newman's Own Light Balsamic in victory. A medium light Italian starlet, daughter of Butch Cassini, named Bitch Cassini, leaps into the balloon basket, kisses Piloto, her lips smeared with Newman's Own Light Balsamic, she murmurs, "You taste of Sicily, of Vesuvius, of Naples, baby", and patting his fanny she whispers, "and no fat."

I was wondering how anyone could possibly quaff salad dressing until I actually tasted the stuff. It's totally quaffable...

not that I did. No, really, I didn't! I'm serious.

..okay, I may have taken a little sip.

Anyway, these are the movies planned (if I can find them) for my theatrical movie marathon dedicated to the late, great Paul Newman.

The Sting
Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid
Cool Hand Luke
Cat On A Hot Tin Roof

It was a dark and stormy night...

...literally.

Ominously, it started storming out as I was preparing to post today's blog, so I think I will postpone it until tomorrow. I need to go buy some salad dressing first anyway.

Immortal McHorror burger is 12 years old, looks just like new

http://www.boingboing.net/2008/09/25/immortal-mchorror-bu.html

Karen Hanrahan has been using the same McDonald's hamburger as a prop in her "Healthy Choices for Children" class since 1996 -- 12 years! -- and it's hardly aged a day in all that time

That is horrifying. Good thing I'm not a fan of McDonald's...although to be fair, a Burger King hamburger would probably be exactly the same. Hey, I don't eat Burger King hamburgers! Score!

In other news...

http://popwatch.ew.com/popwatch/2008/09/toms-diner-vega.html?xid=rss-popwatch-20080926-Suzanne%20Vega:%20Now%20the%20story%20behind%20'Tom's%20Diner'%20can%20be%20told

Turns out Suzanne Vega is just as compelling a storyteller in prose as she is in song. Courtesy of the New York Times, here's her essay on the fascinating history of her 1987 song "Tom's Diner," from her composition of the tune in the Upper West Side eatery it later helped make famous

I, uh, didn't think anyone was actually waiting for this story to be told but....I guess it's a good story.

Entertainment Weekly Parodies Infamous New Yorker Cover

http://gawker.com/5054741/entertainment-weekly-parodies-infamous-new-yorker-cover

There's faux conservopundit Stephen Colbert, dressed as a smirking Michelle "Angela Davis" Obama, terrorist fist-bumping with his old Daily Show boss Jon Stewart, who is clad in Islamobama gear.

That's awesome, and serves as more proof that Stephen Colbert and Jon Stewart rule. I even read Colbert's book (I Am America! And So Can You). I really need to renew my Entertainment Weekly subscription.

Global Media Sours on David Blaine's half-ass stunt

http://gawker.com/5054287/global-media-sours-on-david-blaines-half+ass-stunt

Yesterday we (and others) pointed out that "magician" David Blaine is a big fat cheater, because his current death-defying stunt—hanging upside-down in Central Park for 60 hours—involves hourly ten-minute breaks.

Blaine's flack said there was never any claim he would hang for 60 consecutive hours.

Somehow I'm not surprised. Now I'm really glad I spent the evening alternating between Bush's address to the nation and Futurama. What a waste of time.

Chromakey fail, teeth inquiries

Two new videos today! In the first, I spectacularly failed to completely understand how to do the chromakey thing. You'll be able to tell which clips are the ones I tried to do, because they look like shit.




Never mind about her teeth, Blogger's epic fail as a video host led to the audio for this being nonexistent.