Friday, June 21, 2013

Okami Chapter 31: I Infiltrated Ponc'tan and All I Got Was a Lousy Celestial Envoy

Hello, heroes, and welcome to yet another blog post about Okami. In today's post, I enter Ponc'tan, home of the Poncles, alone because Issun was too much of a pussy to go with me. Will we finally find out the mysteries of Issun's origin? Read on to find out!

After the Lucky Mallet was done shrinking me, I floated into Ponc'tan like a little piece of pollen, and I found...this!


It's...so much prettier than I was expecting. I mean, nobody expects the inside of an old stump to look like that, do they?



I found these things while I was exploring. I...I don't really know. Pretty sure they're a cucumber and an eggplant, but I have no idea why they're on stilts.


And here's a blurry picture of actual Ponc'tan from a different vantage point.

Well, anyway. Enough time-wasting! I decided to get down to business and find the village's leader, Ishaku.


What? Oh man, I swear I didn't roll in any poop before I came in...


Better believe it, old man!


Woof woof?


Aww, all of a sudden this got really sad...
















I'll just be over here in the corner for a while...


What's that? Oh, I just...got something in my eye. Don't mind me.


Squint really hard!



Aww...


No need to be such a jerk about it...



That's my little secret.


:D


I remember you? Oh, right, from before.




I get the feeling I'm supposed to be thinking something along the lines of, "You, lead? NEVER!"


Legendary, eh? I thought Issun was the legendary swordsman...


Oh, self-proclaimed. Well, that explains a lot.


I guess, although the failing eyes are a definite minus.



Well, you do still live in a tree stump despite having gone up in the world...


Doesn't everyone? Sheesh.


Hey! I've been working on that! I've gotten almost all of them back!


Like I said, I'm working on that...


Hey, I haven't heard anything about you in the tales about me. Just the tales about Shiranui the Legendary Wolf, or whatever my title was.


How dare they!


Yet I keep accomplishing things against all odds. Doesn't that say something about faith?


You don't have to keep rubbing it in...


Let me guess. I couldn't possibly defeat the powers of darkness.


And yet I've been fighting off the powers of darkness this whole game so far. Have faith in Me!


Well, uh...about that....


Well, I had a companion, but he didn't want to come in...


Oh, no. Of course not.



I really wished I could talk during this part so I could tell him Issun was with me.



Oh? Tell me more.


Celestial Envoys? How quaint.


Right, right, I knew that. So, speaking of Celestial Envoys, I think I have one traveling with me...


I knew that too. So, uh, what do we do?


I see.




I see. So is that why there's a painting of me on the wall over there?


What do the rest of them do, then?


So...who's the Celestial Envoy now?


So the five previous Celestial Envoys traveled with me too? I'm confused.


So you couldn't be the Celestial Envoy again, is what you're saying.

He went on to explain that he'd decided to teach his people everything he'd learned.


How strict are we talking, exactly?


That's...cool, I guess.


Talk to them? Well, I am here to see if anyone's heard anything about that missing girl...



Well, about that...I, uh, may have already decided....



I'll, uh...have to let you know who I choose, okay?


Come to think of it, I haven't seen Issun do any painting at all...interesting.



I see. I'll have to make sure I remember that, since the entire sentence is in Clue Red.

So, after I was done talking to Ishaku, I heroically asked around and found someone who knew something about Lika and didn't waste any time at all went outside and talked to Issun some more, wandered around outside for a while, and finally went back into Ponc'tan to find whoever I'd missed. Cue my meeting with Miya!


Miya was some random Poncle in the one house in the village I hadn't visited. Figures.


...and then turned around and went somewhere she'd be easier to find?


...Oh. That doesn't help at all. And what is the Spirit Gate, exactly?



I don't think I want to know any more about it.



Just when this story got convoluted enough, they added time travel? But time travel always screws everything up...



Well, I should think so...we don't want to deal with all that timey-wimeyness, do we?


Good plan. When do we get to steer well clear of it?


...you just had to follow her, right? You couldn't leave well enough alone.

Well, that would have ended badly in this case, but still.

Sorry for the fuzziness in these photos, by the way. I don't know what happened.



Well, I guess we don't have to worry about a bystander effect here. But that's a good thing.


I'm guessing that wasn't supposed to happen.


Uh oh. So I suppose we should go rescue her, right?


...................

WHY THE HELL DIDN'T YOU TELL ISHAKU?! ARE YOU REALLY THAT STUPID?

Fine, I'll do what you should have done and tell him myself. I guess the bystander effect does apply here. What a moron.


Somehow Ishaku can read my mind, which is good since I don't have Issun to talk for me. And he traveled with me before, apparently, so he should be able to tell what I'm thinking, right?


If you insult me I'm going to lose interest in helping any of you really, really fast.


I dunno, I feel like that every time I walk into your house...


Well, some girl from the village managed to disappear through it, so we have a reason now.



Hand it over, then!


...I ALREADY HAVE A CELESTIAL ENVOY. GIMME THE GODDAMN SWORD!


I've been trying to tell you forever. I already have a Celestial Envoy.


Yes you do! He's my Celestial Envoy!


Because you were too hard on him?


Oh, so he did steal the painting. Well, whatever. More important things are at stake here!


I think I'm wasting my time here. Let's go check out the Spirit Gate ourselves.


Looks like we'll have to, yes. Why? Are you going to watch us go in and then not tell anyone?


Well, you see, we're doing what YOU should have done a long time ago. Moron.


I agree. Let's go!

Actually, I'm not sure what the point of that little interlude was. I think it was just that Issun didn't want to talk to someone from his village. Well, she's not worth talking to anyway, so we'll just move on.


Inner Yoshpet...even worse than Outer Yoshpet. Why did we come here again?


Oh, right. Spirit Gate.


Well, this sounds fun. Tell me more about the Spirit Gate.



Haven't I heard this spiel before? When you were talking about that mechanism we had to activate to get to Kamui in the first place?


Why is everything always "They say,"? Why doesn't anyone actually know anything about what they're talking about?


So you're saying Yoshpet isn't big in the tourist trade?


Then how did that little girl get in?


Oh boy, here we go again.



That sounds just peachy!



Okay, let's get this over with, then.

I couldn't take photos of us traversing this part of the forest either. You'll just have to take my word for it. Let's just say it was annoying and I may have died a couple of times.


Woohoo! We made it without passing out!


Looks like a Spirit Gate to me! Because I'm an expert in these things.



You already said that. Get to the good part!


So basically forever, is what you're saying?



I see.


But Ishaku isn't here, so...


Oh, NEEDLESSLY. Well, that makes me feel better. Wait, what about when that girl went through it? What that a needless opening? My head hurts.



A wibbly-wobbly, timey-wimey sort of disaster?


Whoa, whoa, whoa! Let's not get too hasty here!



Right, but I thought Ishaku had to be the one to...oh, never mind.

And then Issun whipped out his little sword and...


With a horrible screeching noise...


...the gate was breached. I guess.


The gate is opening!



I wonder if this is foreshadowing that Issun will become the leader of the tribe? This whole thing is kinda messed-up timewise, after all...


The gate is open! When can we go through?


If he knew about the missing girl, he'd probably forgive you.


If you insist...


Why are we sitting here looking at it? Let's go in before someone sees us!


I'm trying to get you to understand we need to go through the gate before somebody catches us...


Never mind. Too late.


Uh...there's someone behind us...



SHUT UP AND LOOK BEHIND YOU!



Aw, dammit, it's Oki! What do you want, you goof?


Amaterasu. My name is Amaterasu.



Hey, screw you too, buddy!


Well, we don't want you here! Go away!



I'm guessing few people have.


That's right! Give it to him, Issun!


Without a guide, even? How are you not conked out under a tree somewhere? Preferably an angry tree.


Yeah, yeah. Explain yourself!





So why don't you? Just fall over already!


The sacred sword you STOLE....


It probably wants you to give it back, or...something.


Which it hasn't done yet...



And that's relevant how?


You want to go to the heavens? Why? I played Dragon Age, visiting the heavens is a bad idea!


Agreed...


I have a bad feeling about this guy...


So what's the big deal then?



So go kill more monsters and get out of our hair.



What? No, wait!


NO KILLY MONSTERS IN THE PAST BAD BAD HAVEN'T YOU EVER HEARD THAT SAYING ABOUT THE BUTTERFLY


STOP STOP YOU MORON


LISTEN TO THE LITTLE BUG


Yeah, and look what happened to her!

Well, I guess we don't actually know, but she hasn't come back yet...


Yeah! Listen to Issun before you do something that makes Back to the Future Part II look like child's play!


Ugh. You're an idiot.


Too late now! After him!


I really hope we don't regret thiiiiiiiiiiiis!

And with that, I've reached my stopping point for today. Check back next time as we travel back...way back...BACK INTO TIME.

Until next time, heroes!

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