Saturday, October 15, 2011

Twilight Princess Chapter 22: Have Fun Storming the Castle!

Hello, everyone! Unexpected writing time is the best writing time, in my opinion. Why? Because it makes me feel like less of a failure for not posting as often as I should. So. Let's get this show on the road!

Our first order of business was to head to Hyrule Castle to rescue Zelda. But first I had to have Midna do something about the weird gold shield-thing blocking access to the castle...

So she got out the Fused Shadows and twirled them around for a while. Then they formed themselves into another goofy-looking helmet. And then things got weird.

It's almost comical. Hey, Midna, how do you see out of that thing? Why do you look like it's too heavy for you to wear and still float above the ground?

Anyway, after she put the Fused Shadows on her head, an invisible force started throwing her around and bouncing her off the walls. It's like using the Fused Shadows makes you feel like you put a little too much sugar in your Cheerios or something. Suddenly, BAM! You're slamming into walls and breaking your favorite toys.

Eventually Midna bounced her way off enough walls to disappear from view...and then came back.

Wh...what is that? Do I want to know? I don't think I want to know.

Oh. It's a giant Midna-spider-thing. That looks friendly.

Cool, I guess. Well, let's see what it does...oh, look at that, it jumped right on the force field.

For some reason I found myself thinking about those robotic spider things from Ghost in the Shell while I was watching this. Huh. Well, anyway, Midna-spider jumped on the force field and then used her magical powers to make it disappear. Great, just...don't, you know, come any closer to me than you have to.

Intense. Well, let's move on. The force field disappeared, and then, in a practically patentable saccharine moment, Midna woke up in Link's arms!

The conversation they should have had practically writes itself. "Oh, Midna! You scared me! Don't ever do anything like that again, you rascal!" "Okay, Link! Boy, was I silly! We'll be friends forever, right?" "Uh, right. Yeah. Just don't fall in love with me, because I already have two chicks on the side." "You horndog, you!"

And with that...the way to Hyrule Castle was clear, and Link carried Midna through the gateway.

Eventually, Midna apparently recovered and disappeared back into my shadow, because by the time I got closer to the door, she was gone.

Look at all those birds flying around. Fun! Well, let's keep moving. I headed to the right first, where some enemies waited in front of a door. I dispatched them and went through, and found a quiet, rainy area where I had to make my way past various small puzzles to get to an area containing a lot of gates, some boars, and a large open area. I had to fight, yet again, the head Moblin guy...I think. It's hard to keep things straight sometimes. I had to fight the Moblin guy somewhere; that's all I'm sure of right now.

Really? Is he going to show up on my doorstep with a Wii remote? This could get interesting. But first I have to kill you once and for all, guy! Let's fight!

A key?! Give it here, man!

Really? Does that mean you follow me from now on? Because it's pretty clear that my side is the strongest side. And why wouldn't I want you on my side, since you JUST WON'T DIE??? Argh.

DUH. Is he on my side? Who knows!

After I was done with that, I made my way to the door on the left side of the original courtyard, where more monsters were waiting to be killed. After they died, I went through the door and found myself solving more puzzles. On a hunch, at the end of the area I turned into Wolf Link and looked around for digging spots. I found one...which led to a mysterious graveyard area! Weird. And apparently it was a midget graveyard, because most of the skeletons that promptly popped out of the ground to attack me were midget-sized, aside from the occasional Stalfos.

After I killed the skeletons, I was faced with yet another puzzle to solve. Thankfully, there were two handy Clue Gravestones nearby.

Well, that doesn't make any sense at all. Let's see what the other one says.

That's not so bad. So I found a tree with a bombable spot in front of it and blew it up, revealing a switch that opened up a gated area at one end of the courtyard. Inside was a switch, or torch, or something, that made the rain stop temporarily. This allowed me to light two torches in front of the other gated area, making the gate open and allowing me access to the two owl statues inside. I had to move them to their proper spots, then jump across them to get to the last hidden key. When I was done, Midna had some helpful words.

Cool. Thanks for that. Why haven't you told me that in any of the other dungeons we've been to before now? It would have been really useful...well, whatever.

On the way back to the main door, I encountered a boar somewhere and turned into Wolf Link to see if I could talk to it. No such luck.

Apparently the boars are just too dumb to talk. Well, I suppose I shouldn't be surprised, what with how it's impossible to steer them with any accuracy when they're charging at something. Whatever. When I got back to the main area, it was time to actually go inside the castle...and this is what I found!

Impressive. It was basically just a big room full of chandeliers and balconies. I had to fight some enemies as soon as I walked in, of course, but after they were all dead the chandeliers lit themselves!

See? Everything's much happier with the chandeliers lit.

I really didn't take enough pictures of the inside of the castle, but whatever. I had to use the Clawshots on the bottom of one of the chandeliers to get onto one of the balconies and loot its spoils, then travel from chandelier to chandelier to get to another balcony with a door that I went through. Then I solved more puzzles, etc. and finally got to a hallway with two Darknuts in it.

Yeah, no thanks. I fought them once, and due to my overconfidence in thinking I still had a fairy in a bottle, promptly died to my ineptitude at fighting two Darknuts at once. So when I reloaded I went through a different doorway and avoided them altogether to get to where I was going...which was a walkway on the roof, I guess.

Once I got onto the walkway outside, I made my way to a tower and fought another one of those dragony things with the Clawshot-target shields for a key, then made my way to another tower. Just when it looked like things were about to go bad for me (a whole bunch of enemies to fight, plus Bokoblins shooting at me from the tower), the members of the Resistance appeared and blowed some things up real good. "Who?" you might ask. Those goofs hanging around in Telma's bar doing nothing, that's who. Including...Rusl!

Well, at least he's doing something constructive now. And it won't be long until he can go home to his family, I guess. Well, I hope, anyway. So the way was cleared by the Resistance, and I got the Boss Key out of the tower and headed back inside.

This room looked daunting until I remembered to turn into Wolf Link and use my senses to spot the creepy ghosts who, despite being creepy, were pointing the way for me (they showed up in other various places in the castle, pointing at other things, too).

Creepy...but useful. I just had to follow the ghosts, and all was well. At the other end of the room, I found a hallway with a staircase leading upward, except large chunks of the stairs were missing, so I had to use the Clawshots on the lamp covers on the walls to get past the stairs. I got to a landing with some monsters I had to kill, and then I got to another staircase leading upward, which was missing most of its stairs...but it had Spinner tracks going up it! Yay!

Yeah, there were spiky things on the Spinner tracks, too. But whatever. I whipped out the Spinner and made my way all the way up the staircase in one try (I have a witness who can attest to this) just like old times. Yay!

At the top of the stairs, unfortunately, I had to fight a Darknut, but he wasn't too difficult, just sort of time-consuming. Whatever. He fell before the might of the Master Sword, and I used my remaining key to open a door to a room full of treasure. But, this game being what it is, I couldn't fit all the rupees I found inside into my wallet. It was hard enough understanding why they'd bother giving us rupees at this stage anyway (Magic Armor?) but I had to leave three chests there because my wallet was full. But I did find this in one of the smaller chests.

Really? You actually went to the bother of putting one Rupee in the chest? What a waste of time and space. Looking on the bright side, though, at least I could put it in my wallet. Sigh.

And with that, the only thing left to do was open up the Boss Door and get this show on the road. But I didn't have time to do that today, so we'll have to leave that until my next post. Which is a good thing, because I can empty my wallet before I come back and then get the rest of the Rupees out of the treasure room before I kick Ganondorf's ass.

Next time: VENGEANCE! RETRIBUTION! And an empty treasure room, presumably.

1 comment:

Styve said...

I actually accidently got Midna to take out the big yellow shield around the castle a week or two ago, but it was kind of nice to run around Hyrule and not see a big golden blob in the background. I feel like I missed some storyline about how Midna could/would turn into a spider thing when she assembled the fused shadow. Also, her stone hat thing she's been wearing the whole time? Part of the shadow!! You'd think she'd mention something like that.

Link really needs to sort out his romantic priorities. Is he falling for Midna now? But Zelda's just ahead! And Ilia's still waiting... (The end scene after beating the game does little to clarify this love quadrangle.)

That king Moblin guy never gives up... or dies! I'd really like more of his backstory. Also, for being a warrior, he's pretty slow and easy to defeat hand-to-hand and without his lackeys firing arrows at me.

I'd forgotten about the hidden graveyard and bonus key. However, since I'd already saved the game and come back the next day, all the enemies regenerated. But I just ran past them, stole a boar, and barreled my way through the fences back to the wind room where the dig spot was. Tedious.

Was not expecting the Stalfos in the graveyard though. I was just minding my own business, trying to light some torches in the rain, when this looming skeleton guy comes lurching up to me. He was easy enough to kill with some bomb arrows, but still I could tell Link's heart was all a'flutter.

I was honestly a little touched when the Resistance came to my rescue. I could see Link thinking, "Damn! We're in a tight spot!" But there came Rusl and the others. He really needs to get back to Ordon... pretty sure he's going to miss the birth of his baby.

So many Darknuts!!! While I don't mind fighting one at a time since they are one of those rare enemies that actually require some strategy to kill, I hate multiple Darknuts! They just get mean! And somehow they don't hurt each other when they're swinging their swords around, often right into the other Darknut. My favorite move is the "Draw" hidden skill where I put away my sword and wait till the button says "draw" and I attack! Mwuahaha! They never see it coming.

The many rupees do come in handy for the magic armor, which I highly recommend for the sword fight with Ganondorf, v. 4.0, during the boss battle. Don't bother with it before then, especially if you've got some blue potion and/or great fairy tears. Also, I know the fairies are nice and all, but they only refill 8 hearts, whereas the blue potion does your whole heart meter and is thus totally worth the money. Plus, what else are you going to spend all those rupees on??

'Til next time, hero, when vengeance will surely be yours!