Thursday, September 8, 2011

Twilight Princess Chapter 14: HAHAHAHA....WIPEOUT!

Hello and welcome to another installment of the Twilight Princess replay. This post is going to be shorter than usual, because for some reason there wasn't as much stuff to do in between dungeons this time. Sigh. I guess I don't really have anything else to say, so...on with the show!

Common sense dictated that I go to Castle Town and see who I was supposed to talk to in the bar, but instead I went to Kakariko Village to see if Prince Ralis would know anything. I found him in front of his father's grave.

He went on to babble about how he didn't know what to do with his life and he felt like a coward. Haven't I encountered somebody like this already? Colin, right? I didn't know Ralis changed his name to Colin. Well, weirder things have happened, I guess.

Poor Ralis didn't have much else to say that was helpful, so I decided to sniff around Zora's Domain to see what I could dig up there. Although most of the time I wasn't in wolf form, so I wasn't so much sniffing and digging as just...running around talking to people.

The first thing I managed to find out is that apparently Gorons can breathe underwater. Who knew, right? Oh, right...they're technically made of stone, right? Or something? So they don't need to breathe? Whatever...

Well, I decided to sink down to the bottom of the throne room to talk to some of the Zoras there, and one of them said something about how the rock I dropped in there to melt the ice was looking at her. So I took a look at the rock, and it totally was looking at us with a weird purple eye. Not really sure why it was purple, but we don't question these things, I guess. So, being the innovator I am, I put a Water Bomb next to the rock, blew it up...and out came a Goron. Who didn't have purple eyes. Weird!

He went on to say that he was sleeping on Death Mountain one day and woke up to find himself surrounded by lava, and then he was inside this rock. He's just been waiting for someone to break him out. You know the worst thing? I don't think I ever did this in my first game. Poor Goron, trapped inside a rock at the bottom of the Zora throne room for all eternity. Although Gorons eat rocks, so he probably could have just eaten his way out once he got hungry enough.

And then he didn't even leave.

Look at him. He's just chilling there underwater. Forever, for all I know. Well, let's move on.

I also found this gem while talking to some of the Zora guards.

Really? You're just standing there guarding an empty throne? I have a suggestion for you. Why don't you and your useless friends get yourselves to Kakariko Village and escort Ralis back to where he belongs? I'm sure that, as an aquatic creature, he really wants to stand in a dusty graveyard for the rest of his life. Morons...

Okay, moving on.

The word on the street, I the stream...from the Zoras...said that some kind of snow monster had been spotted in Zora's Domain recently. Although apparently nobody talked to him. So I decided to head to Snowpeak and see what I could find. And look!

Is it the snow creature?

Oh. No, it's just some chick from the bar. She gave me a sketch of the creature and told me it had been eating red fish lately, but the only way to catch the fish is with a certain type of rare coral. I was struck with inspiration by this, and immediately headed to Kakariko to show the sketch to Prince Ralis. Sure enough, he knew what it was!

He just happened to have some of the coral I needed to catch a reekfish (of course) and he was happy to give it to me! I was just glad I didn't have to do some dumb fetch quest or something before he'd give it to me.

Yay! Now I can catch a reekfish! Time to warp back to Zora's Domain.

But first, Ralis had to tell me all about how suddenly he knew what his life's purpose should be and that he was going to go home and lead his people. Cool, Colin. I mean, Ralis. You just go do your thing, man. And the funny part is, I talked to Beth in Kakariko Village afterward and she's all like, "Well, I don't think he's depressed anymore, but he still just stands in the graveyard anyway." So...they're not even bothering to move him back home so the guards can stop guarding their empty throne? Lame, Nintendo.

Okay, anyway. We warped back to Zora's Domain.

You know, there's something odd about this. Midna won't change me into a wolf in front of other people, claiming it "might scare someone" or something. Yet apparently she doesn't think anyone would have a problem with a wolf and an imp appearing out of nowhere and falling into the water?

We literally just show up from the warp portal in the sky and then fall into the water in front of at least 10 Zoras, none of whom bat an eye at this. I really don't think they'd mind if they saw me turn into a human. But whatever.

Ralis (I think it was Ralis) had told me to fish for the Reekfish around the Mother and Child rocks in Zora's Domain. Mother and Child, eh? They couldn't think of a different rock formation to use? Since, you know, there's a Mother and Child Island in Wind Waker. I mean, there are different rock formations out there. I'm just saying.

So, after a few minutes of fishing...

After I caught the fish, it flopped around on the ground for a while, which confused me slightly until I noticed the cloud of stench coming from it and turned into Wolf Link.

Yay! Let's see where this scent leads!

....But first, let's take a detour to the Gerudo Desert and use Midna's super-strength to warp the broken piece of bridge back to the Bridge of Eldin, because I forgot to do it before.

Yay, the bridge is fixed!

Yep. Definitely fixed.

As an added bonus, as I was preparing to leave the Bridge of Eldin area, I happened to notice a Clawshot target on a nearby wall, which led to a cave, which led (eventually) to a Piece of Heart. This completed another Heart Container for me! Yay!

After I was done celebrating, it was time to head to Snowpeak and see where the Reekfish scent would lead me.

This looks fun.

So Midna and I followed the Reekfish scent over ice, through snow, past snow wolves and ice Keese, up hills, and through more snow. Eventually we found ourselves at the top (more or less) of the mountain. What fun.

And at the very top...I found the Abominable Snowman! I mean...a yeti.

He is completely surprised to see me. Also, I like how the fish he's holding is bigger than I am, but the one I caught was a paltry 27 inches. Lame.

So, I told the yeti what was up and he invited me to his house, because apparently he has a piece of the mirror there. This isn't going to end badly, I can tell. Especially since the only way to get to his house is to knock an ice leaf out of the tree and...snowboard our way there?

Yeah, I...can't I just hop on your back and ride with you, or...something...?

I...well, there he goes. I totally could have just sat on his shoulders for this.

Sigh. Well, let's get this trainwreck on the road.

Actually, it really wasn't that bad. I just have vague memories of crashing and burning the previous time I did this.

After a minimum of hilarity, I finally arrived at the yeti's house.

Beast-man? Come on, Midna. I thought we were above species-ist comments.

Ugh. This place looks cold, doesn't it? I guess we'll find out next time, after I have time to play the dungeon! Hah! See you next time, heroes!

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